Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 462

The missing H

I love to tease my American friends about their pronunciation of the word ‘herbs’.

‘Say the words I spell out,’ say I. ‘H-E-R-B-S.’
‘Oh, ‘erbs,’ they say.
‘What are you, effing French!? It’s only acceptable to say that word that way in a French accent,’ tease I. ‘Now say this word: H-O-T-E-L.’
‘Hotel, with the H pronounced,’ sigh my friends.

But wait…! There is a rebellion and a retort from the American team!

‘Say the word H-O-N-O-R,’ says one friend.
‘Ah, you caught me,’ say I in defeat. ‘Honor, sans the H.’

(Although, I am thinking in my head, I’d spell it with a ‘u’. πŸ˜‰

Eddie Izzard gets it right. Watch and smile!

Enid Blyton

I was shocked to discover my American friends had not heard of British children’s author and legend Enid Blyton, nor read any of her books in the 70s and 80s when they were growing up. (I know this because there were seven of us and I referred to us as ‘The Secret Seven‘!) They’d not even heard of her when her life story was made into a movie starting Helena Bonham Carter πŸ˜‰

Of course her writing is now considered rather sexist and racist and the writing is certainly dated, but Enid Blyton’s skill for weaving a thrilling adventure still enthralls me, and there’s much to be said for encouraging the imagination with stories such as The Magic Faraway Tree and The Famous Five books.

So, what did American children read with a torch under the duvet covers after lights out in the 50s, 60s, 70s and 80s? The Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew? (We read those too in the UK πŸ˜‰ ).

Answers to the above on a postcard please, or better yet post a comment below!

Helena as Enid

Helena as Enid

Tennis Shoes

I still find the American use of the words ‘tennis shoes’ funny in a cute way. I can’t help it, I just do. πŸ™‚

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 461

American ‘schools’

I get very confused when Americans say, for example: ‘My girlfriend is at school’, especially when those Americans are in their 20s and 30s, because then I have to remind myself that when they say ‘school’ they actually mean ‘university’ and not that their girlfriend is a ‘minor’ and in high school, cos that would be slightly wrong, and plus I’m not sure that’s legal, even in Alabama.

Howard County State Fair

Ah, a county fair or state fair, the epitome of Americana. Bring on the corn dogs, the deep fried Oreos, the cows for Best in Show, the parades, the line dancing and the Demolition Derbys (we ‘darby’, you say ‘durby’ πŸ˜‰ ).

State fairs look like this :)

State fairs look like this πŸ™‚

Hmmmm

Hmmmm

Best in show!

Best in show!

The summer’s almost over

Yep, it flies by, even if the school holidays seem to go on foreverrrrrrrrr.

Ten days still school starts, and that means shelling out hundreds of dollars on classroom necessities like markers and erasers and folders. I don’t know if this happens back home in the UK, but it’s quite the thing over here. I’m all for recycling, so some of those pens that Harry’s classroom will receive may only last for a few pictures πŸ˜‰

Two years down

We’ve been in the USA for two years this week. Boy, it’s flown by!

Here are a few links to some of my favourite memories and blog posts over the past two years.

Enjoy!

The Kettle Blog

The Going Out for Ice Cream Blog

The Miami Blog

Bringing up my British boy in the USA blog

Bacon Festivals and American/British accents Blog

The American Driving Blog

πŸ™‚

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 460

Breathtaking Sites of the American West

The Real Appeal of the American West

Every region of the U.S. offers its own unique brand of American excitement, and those travelling through the 50 states will be treated to a host of experiences they could never find elsewhere in the globe. Those heading through to the American West, however, best prepare for a multi-sensory treat, as this particular region is rife with endless possibilities and rich experiences.

For example, many head out to California simply to drive their way up the Pacific Coast and enjoy the various attractions and sites along the way. Not only is this wonderful state home to so many beautiful beaches and delicious food, but it’s also a hotspot for technological development. While Southern California has some of the most amazing beaches in the country, Northern California is home to the famous Silicon Valley, where the world’s top tech companies converge.

Silicon_Valley_large

Let’s not forget that California is also home to Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) – one of the oldest airports in the world, described by Parking for LessΒ as having a rather illustrious history, even being used by the military in WW2. LAX is the third busiest airport in the whole U.S., servicing upwards of 66 million passengers in 2013. In and around LAX, tourists can find a variety of different natural parks, piers, and even shopping centres to lose themselves in.

LAX

LAX

There are dozens of other popular cultural draws and attractions to the American West as well, from the food and craft beer scene in Denver, to the vibrant sports scene in Seattle, etc. But the real value of a trip out west is in seeing some of the beautiful national parks and nature preserves in the region. Here’s a look at some of the most spectacular sites and destinations:

Zion National Park

Zion

Zion

Somewhat overshadowed by the more famous Grand Canyon in the American southwest, Zion National Park in Utah is best known for the breathtaking Angel’s Landing hike.

Bryce Canyon

Bruce Canyon

Bruce Canyon

Also in Utah, Bryce Canyon is incredible to explore. Its bright orange rock formations form dramatic surroundings as visitors hike or ride horses down into the canyon.

Olympic National Park

Olympic National Park

Olympic National Park

Officially created by President Teddy Roosevelt in the early 1900s, Olympic National Park hosts an incredible variety of nature, from its own Pacific coastline, to towering mountains and even a temperate rainforest.

Crater Lake National Park

Crater Lake

Crater Lake

The only national park in Oregon, its main attraction is Crater Lake itself, which is the deepest lake in the U.S., and incredible to behold.

Yosemite National Park

Yosemite

Yosemite

Arguably the most famous national park in the United States, Yosemite has earned its reputation through incomparable beauty.

Lake Tahoe

Emerald Bay

Emerald Bay

Located high in the Sierra Nevada mountains, Lake Tahoe makes for a beautiful warm weather destination, and is also home to some wonderful skiing in the winter.

Colorado Rockies

Maroon Bells

Maroon Bells

The Colorado Rocky Mountains, specifically in the Aspen area, are not only for skiing. As is the case with Lake Tahoe, they also make incredible hiking destinations in warm weather seasons.

Wow, the American West is AWESOME. I really hope I can visit all of them whilst I’m in the USA. My Bucket List grows longer by the day! πŸ™‚

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 459

California – the final part!

San Francisco

I was very excited to be approaching San Francisco because, as anyone who has ever worked with me will know, when I am bored I like to play games and when we played that game asking where and when you would have liked to have lived in the past, I always said San Francisco in the late 1960s/early 1970s (a bit like Jenny in Forrest Gump).

Anyway, that was a long-winded way of saying that I thought I might have an affinity with San Francisco.

And I liked it a lot, but I didn’t LOVE it the way I loved other bits of California. And I suspect it’s a bit like meeting a pen-friend who you’ve been reading about and corresponding with and you’ve got a romantic idea about them, but when you meet them you just like them loads and wot not, but you’re never going to totally fall in love, though you’ll definitely see each other again.

Like that.

Stunning skyline of San Fran

Stunning skyline of San Fran

The hippie/vintage bits rocked, I loved the boat rides to see the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz, the Crookedest Street was cool, the culture and music and books and art were funky, Chinatown was amazing, the trams were fun and all that….but, you know what it is with me…..it was too effing cold! When the sun did come out it was great, but places always look and feel better in the sun, I think.

Golden Gate Bridge

Golden Gate Bridge

Alcatraz

Alcatraz

Chinatown

Chinatown

The Crookedest Street

The Crookedest Street

It’s so cold that people in San Francisco were wearing REAL clothes like shoes and jeans and hoodies and tights in the daytime. For real! That doesn’t happen anywhere else in California!! I can’t live here in August! (Okay, I hear it is one of the coldest months πŸ˜‰ ). And it’s windy. Advice for San Fran: don’t wear a mini-skirt. (Still, good excuse to go clothes shopping!)

But, there was an intriguing vibe to San Francisco, and to be honest, after the nature and beauty of some of the mountains, desert and coastline we’d driven trough it was a bit of a shock to the system and my sensibilities. So, I want to go back to San Francisco (sans enfant, I think) and experience it again and dig a little deeper and go off the tourist track, because I know there is a bit there for me to feel right at home.

Hope you enjoyed the California Roadtrip blog series! It was a trip of a lifetime πŸ™‚ .

Don’t forget you can vote for my blog by going here and scrolling to no. 56 and voting for me in the Best of Howard County polls.

We’re off to New Orleans this weekend, so expect some Bourbon Street blog stuff coming your way shortly! πŸ˜‰

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 458

California, part 7

Seals, dolphins, Santa Barbara, Carmel, 17 mile drive, wine tasting California stylie

‘Ya gotta see the elephant seals when ya stop off on ya drive along the coast. They’re awesome’ says an American lady to us.

‘Sounds totally brilliant,’ say we Brits.

And they were awesome, she was right.

Hundreds of the noisy buggers!

Hundreds of the noisy buggers!

They stretched our for miles across the sand and in the water

They stretched our for miles across the sand and in the water

They made me laugh. See :)

They made me laugh. See πŸ™‚

We spotted the seals along our route from Santa Barbara to Carmel, and it would be very remiss of me not to write about Santa Barbara, probably because my hubby and I both agreed we could definitely live there.

Santa Barbara

Santa Barbara was described to me as ‘what everyone thinks LA is going to be like, but isn’t’. I get that. I think in my head there would be bits of LA like Santa Barbara.

SB is flat and lovely and has a fab beach and nature is in abundance and there is a bar on the beach and people are surfing and you get to do wine tasting and the shops are cool and you can walk everywhere and it has oodles of history. I do get a bit miffed when Brits take the piss out of America for ‘not having history’ because I find American history fascinating – particularly Native American history and the Spanish and Mexican history.

That’s why the Old Mission at Santa Barbara was so spectacular and rich in history and culture. It felt like I was in Spain, and boy it was HOT!

Fabulous Santa Barbara

Fabulous Santa Barbara

The Old Mission

The Old Mission

I love, love, love the beaches here - so peaceful :)

I love, love, love the beaches here – so peaceful πŸ™‚

Carmel

We were looking forward a great deal to Carmel. We had been told the beach was stunning and the town a delight, and the wine just delicious. Right again, on all counts.

I’m not a big fan of Maryland wine – it’s too sweet for me. The Californian wine, however, went down rather too well, and after several flights on a wine tasting tour, Carmel was THE place to be. I almost went hunting down Clint to see if he fancied coming out for a drinkie-poo, but I think he’s getting on a bit now and was probably tucked up in bed with his woolly socks on, cos it does get much cooler at night on the West Coast.

I love Californian wine!

I love Californian wine!

Carmel beach is a dream. White sand, blue sea (far too cold tho!) and a family of three dolphins happily bobbing up and down in the sea, flipping around, swimming back and forth. They were amazing to watch, as were the pelicans diving for a catch.

Carmel beach

Carmel beach

Carmel also was a place of meeting folks with a connection. One bartender was from Columbia, MD and used to babysit for my hubby’s boss! And one restaurant owner owned a house back in the UK where we live and knew the town and some people we know very well! It really is a small world after all, you were right Mr. Disney.

17 Mile Drive

The other place people raved about was 17 Mile Drive. So, naturally, intrigued, we went for the drive.

Now, I think we must have come in at the wrong end of the drive because for the first six or seven miles we weren’t that impressed with the views or the houses.

Then – bam! Hello 17 Mile Drive in all its luxuriousness!

Quite, quite fabulous with its coastline, incredible mansions, golf courses and seals on the shoreline. Wow. It was like going from Aberystwyth to California gold coast in one short drive!

That's a pretty impressive 18th hole on 17 Mile Drive

That’s a pretty impressive 18th hole on 17 Mile Drive

Personally, I think they should get rid of those crappy first six miles and call it 11 Mile Drive πŸ˜‰

Next up: the final leg – San Francisco!

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 457

California, part 6

Santa Monica

The beaches in California make me happy with their golden hue and generally gorgeous people and the blue sea and the hot, hot sun.

I think I love the Californian climate the most. It is certainly preferable to the muggy, sticky, swampy East Coast weather (and I’ve not done the Deep South yet folks!).

I love a boardwalk and the West Coast has plenty of ’em. And I confess to rather liking the American pier with the rides and the hot dogs (or fish tacos, if I’m lucky). It’s a little bit tacky and a little bit Blackpool, but when you’re doing it in the Californian sunshine, it works for me!

On Santa Monica pier we met Gary, a British bloke who’s been over here yonks, and who, in his spare time plays footie and read my blog. Gary’s even written something before in this here blog πŸ™‚

Me and Gary in Santa Monica

Me and Gary in Santa Monica

Let it be known that British blokes, even if they’ve lived here forever, bond over fish ‘n’ chips, a pint and talk of footie.

As much as hitting the end of iconic Route 66 made me smile on Santa Monica pier, being at Santa Cruz pier where they filmed the Lost Boys movie made me even happier. To think that Kiefer walked this boardwalk in his vampiric state amused me greatly. I was a little disappointed, however, that the Lost Boys soundtrack was not on constant repeat through the pier speakers. That would have completely made my day!

Getting my kicks at the end of Route 66

Getting my kicks at the end of Route 66

Santa Cruz minus the vampires!

Santa Cruz minus the vampires!

All the fun of the Santa Cruz pier

All the fun of the Santa Cruz pier

American piers and boardwalks are just very, um, very American. And I totally dig them. Fact.

Next up: seals, dolphins, Santa Barbara, Carmel, 17 mile drive, wine tasting California stylie

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 456

California, part 5

Plastic fantastic

I really have to share this LA conversation that I totally eavesdropped on in a fancy Beverly Hills restaurant between two gay guys, who I later found out are make up artists in the industry. I would so love to know who it was they were talking about….

It went like this:

‘She wears so much make up.’
‘I know. Like, she doesn’t need to.’
‘Like, I know, I mean she’s beautiful in a natural way. She’s had no work done.’
[Cue extreme shock] ‘Nothing at all? Does she need some?’
‘A little…’

πŸ˜‰

Camping out in California

Of course, no roadtrip would be complete without a camper van/RV involved. It was with slight reluctance that I partook in this part of the journey mainly because I like my loo to be in the same area as my living quarters. Call me spoilt….

My heart sank a little when I saw ‘Niagra’ and realised the three of us would be living in the small space for four days and I would basically be crawling around on all fours a lot (my husband, on the other hand, rather liked this idea….). But I rallied my great British spirit that embraces stuff like camping and eating cold beans and wot not and decided that this was actually going to be fun.

And it so was.

See how happy I am roadtripping in 'Niagra'!

See how happy I am roadtripping in ‘Niagra’!

Camping at the beach :)

Camping at the beach πŸ™‚

This is what it's all about...

This is what it’s all about…

Fun is cooking up the beans and sausages in the back of the van and watching the sunset in the desert as you drink a cold beer and toast marshmallows on a campfire. (Fun is not washing up in cold water and with soggy bean juice, though…).

Fun is brushing your teeth in the fresh air as the blue jays nibble your nuts ( πŸ˜‰ ) at sunrise in your bikini that you’ve slept in. (Fun is not waking up at 4am and needing a wee and not wanting to go over to the restrooms in case of rattlesnakes and staying awake till 7 to have one.)

Fun is having brekkie on the beach watching the surfers.

Fun is looking at other people’s RVs and wondering why they brought their entire home with them on a camping trip, including flat screen TV and video games.

Suffice to say, I will camp again, and maybe even in the Scooby Doo van! (Note to husband reading this: that’s not to say that I don’t love hotels and showers and pools and bars, cos I do still a lot, πŸ˜‰ ) And I’m not sure I’m ready just yet for a British seaside caravan holibobs, though I’m not knocking it!

Toe-sie

Toe-fie

The Mountains

For me the most spectacular part of the whole roadtrip was the mountains and the scenery we spied during our travels there.

This part of California, near Idyllwild, was breathtaking. It was the part of America I really wanted to see and experience and I was not disappointed. I really felt like I was in the real America when I was in the mountains.

But…omg, those flipping winding mountain roads are enough to take a British gal’s breath away. What were they thinking when they built them (other than ‘we have to create a pass from top to bottom and back again’)?! My husband even felt a little giddy as we descended the mountains.

Thanks!

Thanks!

The desert

The desert

For me, this bit of the roadtrip will stay in my memory forever. Mountains, trees, desert, rocks, geckos, ranches, Native American history, Mexican history, little mountain villages and crazy casinos. Loved it.

Brill

Brill

Love this place, Idyllwild

Love this place, Idyllwild

The roads terrified me!

The roads terrified me!

Screaming selfie in the camper!

Screaming selfie in the camper!

Next up: Santa Monica, Santa Cruz and meeting the Brits.

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 455

California, chapter 4

San Diego

When we first said we were heading to California, most everybody who had been there said that we really must go to San Diego, so we did, and I’m not always one to do something just because everyone says do it, but it must be pretty good if y’all are talking it up were my thoughts.

San Diego

San Diego

Fabulous city

Fabulous city

The thing about San Diego is that it is very charming, and I can’t say our fleeting visit did it justice (we’ll definitely be back to see more of the city) because we were quite distracted by the fact that Comic Con was taking place in the city just two days after our visit. I think Harry would have camped out to see some comic dudes, and I did hear the Game of Thrones cast were in town, but they definitely weren’t having pre-Comic Con fish tacos at our downtown restaurant.

Comic Con in town

Comic Con in town

Fish tacos

At this point I think I need to talk about my slight obsession whilst I was in California with fish tacos.

Now, I’m not a great lover of Mexican food, and whilst being that near to Mexico it seemed almost criminal not to partake in the culinary influences that had seeped over the border (we nearly took our passports on the San Diego visit so we could pop over the border, but someone told me that the next time they’d see me was on the front of the Daily Mail with my head on a spike if we did that, but I think they might have been jesting, in retrospect).

Anyway, fish tacos. They seemed to me a lighter and slightly healthier variation on the taco. So, once tasted they were much-loved, and I can confirm that during my two weeks in California, I ate approximately 15 fish tacos. That is a lot of fish tacos, and I even had one for breakfast one day. Feel free to gag.

The Baja fish taco is the best, with mango salsa

The Baja fish taco is the best, with mango salsa

Next up: plastic surgery conversations in LA and the camper van….

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 454

Pssst….

Just a quick note to say it would be terribly, awfully awesome if you, as a reader of this blog thingymabob where ever in the world you may be, went to THIS link and scrolled to no. 56 and vote for my blog as ‘The Best in Howard County’.

Thanks y'all!

Thanks y’all!

Thanks ever so muchly!

Up next: San Diego-go-go!

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Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 453

California – part 3

Meeting Johnny Depp in LA

Before the west coast roadtrip takes us to San Diego, I must share with you one LA moment that is worthy of a blog post all of its own.

Now, suffice to say that I am a bit of a Johnny Depp fan. So, when my friend Gwen told me his EXACT address just off Sunset Strip, I can confirm that I almost wet my knickers.

That's my Johnny!

That’s my Johnny!

So, gawd bless him, my husband placed Johnny’s address in the Sat Nav, and, playing to my untold excitement, declared: ‘Next stop Johnny Depp’s house.’

Oh, how I shivered with antici…pation (don’t you think Johnny should be the next FrankNFurter by the way!?) What would happen when we set eyes upon each other? Perhaps he would be having a drinky-poo on his deck and invite me in and we’d share a moment as the sun set on the boulevard and then we’d exchange leather bracelets (cos we both have a penchant for that) and he’d tell me I just have to be the heroine in his next [non-action, cos they are a bit crappy] movie.

So, the Sat Nav said we were at the road and that the very place Johnny slept, ate and breathed* was at the end of the road. Oh my! We wound our way up a very, very narrow and very, very windy and very, very steep road to the very top. At this point I must tell you that we were in our camper van, and therefore when we reached the top and saw two gates and a very small and tight turnaround area, we realised that it was going to be troublesome getting out again in said camper van.

It was at this point that I realised Johnny’s house was the very gated and very secure one and that we would not get a look in any which way. Then, we spot the very celebrity-looking folk who are being driven up in a golf cart to a party obviously taking place in the house opposite Johnny’s and they roll their heavily made-up/plastic surgery eyes at us annoying and stupid tourists in our large and indiscrete camper van, and at that moment I felt like a right British wally.

This is the camper van that made its way to Johnny's house ;)

This is the camper van that made its way to Johnny’s house and back again πŸ˜‰

So, we decided to turn around and make our way down the road. And whilst Jonny did not see me on his deck basking in the last rays on the sun, supping a Pinot Noir with my toes wriggling on his hammock, he would have, should he have had the inclination, seen me impatiently and embarrassingly guiding my husband in the camper van for a 14-point turn out of his gated driveway and back down the very narrow, windy and steep hill via his security cameras. It was quite a dramatic exit, it has to be said, and I did turn to smile and wave at the security camera as we left, but I think I was a bit shamefaced about it all by that point.

Sigh.

And that is the story of how I didn’t meet Johnny Depp in Los Angeles.

(* this is only his LA pad when he wasn’t spending most of his time in the UK, which he does a lot – in fact, ironically he was only bloody fimling a new movie in my home town in England at the time of my visitation, I found out later!)

Double sigh πŸ™‚

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