Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 375

Cheeky buggers!

Oooh, my American chums are being right cheeky buggers, messing with my head.

I used a phrase today ‘get cracking’ (as in, ‘Yes, I will get cracking with that’ – to start doing something quickly) and I asked if it was used in American English much.

The reply? ‘Horribly racist term. Embarrassed…’

For one short moment I really believed this to be true and thought I had been offensive. But no, the cheeky buggers were just joshing with me.

So ha bloody ha – I’ll get you back American chums, just you wait. You’ll be saying highly inappropriate British English things soon enough without even realising it…. ๐Ÿ˜‰

They're messing with my head!

They’re messing with my head!

‘They say things backwards’

Dear Harry is picking up on all sorts of differences in the language arena whilst at school.

‘Americans say things backwards sometimes and it really makes me confused.’
‘Like what?’
‘They call a “tummy” a “belly” and a “bottom” a “butt” and sometimes I just don’t know what they’re talking about because they’re saying things backwards.’

I’m guessing by ‘backwards’ he means different. Well, Harry, count yourself lucky – at least your friends aren’t giving you rogue interpretations of words and phrases to get you all in a doo-dah! ๐Ÿ˜‰

An American butt (let me tell you, when I Google imaged those words, you won't believe what came up! And I found a male butt, rather than a female butt - rejoice! ;) )

An American butt (let me tell you, when I Google-imaged those words, you won’t believe what came up! And I found a male butt, rather than a female butt – rejoice! ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

The Art of Undertaking

Good Lord, I’ve mastered it and am thoroughly enjoying it! What is she on about you may ask….?

Undertaking on the freeway/highway/whatever-it’s-called, that’s what!

Yeah, I have thrown all my British Highway Code rules out the window and am now driving with complete abandon, relishing the total and utter freedom of undertaking! Yes, let’s speed up on the inside lane – it feels good!

(Obviously, I do this with total and utter caution as well, since I do not want to cause a crash, but – oh my, it is so liberating!)

Interestingly, nowhere in UK The Highway Code does it say a driver ‘must not’ overtake using an inside lane. In fact, Section 268 states, โ€œDo not overtake on the left or move to a lane on your left to overtake.โ€ The use of ‘do not’ instead of ‘must not’ means it is technically legal to overtake in any lane except the hard shoulder. Ah, semantics!

So I can overtake however I like in the UK when I get back? Can I? No, don’t be daft, I certainly cannot!

Folks who leave notes on the Highway Code say this: ‘Itโ€™s strongly advised you avoid overtaking using the inside lane in any circumstance. The odd undertake here and there wonโ€™t attract too much negative attention from police, particularly if a situation obviously calls for it, but darting across three lanes to cut down the inside of some poor, unsuspecting granny could cause you problems.’

You can get banged up, that's for sure!

You can get banged up, that’s for sure!

Yes, now I remember. Rules exist in the UK, and, if broken on the roads, you get THE GLARE. So what kind of problems would I encounter back home if I drove like I just drove today in the USA?

‘You can be charged with “dangerous driving”, or “driving without due care and attention”, both of which can result in fines and up to eleven points on your licence, depending on the extent of the damage caused by your driving.

‘In fact, dangerous driving can land you a two-year holiday at Her Majestyโ€™s pleasure and youโ€™d have to re-sit your driving test after an obligatory one-year ban. It hardly seems worth it to save a few minutes by breezing past a couple of cars.’

I suspect that the warning and penalty is pretty similar in America-ca-ca, so even though I throughly enjoyed today’s undertaking session whilst listening to Bohemian Rhapsody, I shall attempt to instill my British reserve again and drive with all due care and attention and only overtake on the outside lane.

Hmmm, we’ll see…. ๐Ÿ˜‰

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4 Responses to Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 375

  1. Sally D says:

    Are you permitted to turn right on a red light where you are? I wish they’d introduce it here (turning left of course). Took me a while to get used to it, had plenty of irrate drivers behind me ’till I got used to it! Keeps traffic flowing.

  2. Sally D says:

    Me too, you’ll have to break the habit when you’re home. Very frustrating!

  3. Pingback: Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 461 | ukdesperatehousewifeusa

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