ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 542

Posted on December 16, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

The Best of British

I’ve been hunting high and low recently for some quality British jewellery. Oh, I like Americana stuff here, but there’s something about British jewellery style that I can’t pass up.

And lo, just three weeks before Christmas, I find just what I am looking for! Hiho Silver is a smashingly authentic British silver place with some divine pieces, and they’re all sort of country-fide and Britishy and horsey! I can imagine her Highness Duchess Kate sporting a few of these pieces when she’s doing her rounds at the Badminton Horse Trials 🙂 .

Kate doing her thing at the Badminton Horse Trials

What makes this jewellery so exquisitely British? Well, Hiho Silver is based in the UK in the Somerset countryside, in an old piggery where it’s not unusual to see a herd of cows or a flock of chickens charge by the window or for the animals to follow the staff through the Hiho office. I am not messing with you.

The jewellery is based on ‘countryside lifestyle and equestrianism’ and is aimed at everyone in the ‘country’ scene in the UK. Yep, I am reckoning Zara Phillips has got her mitts on a few pieces in her time.

Anyway, chat away as I do with folk, and the lovely people at Hiho Silver like the Britishness of my blog in the USA, and they have offered a little give-away of one of their fabulous pieces to readers of this blog! You can give it to a loved one, girlfriend, wifey, lover or chum, or just keep it for yourself! 😉 You can wear it with some wellies and pretend you’re all British and wotnot and like to drink Pimms and tea and say ‘Fancy that’ a lot.

Would you like to win a piece of Hiho Silver jewellery? Yes, Brits or Americans, or readers of this blog anywhere in the world, you can get this piece sent to you as a little silver treat! It’s a Silver Sterling Beaded Friendship Bracelet and it’s simply stunning.

You can win this!

Just answer this question and email me at clairebolden@hotmail.com by Friday 19 December with your name and address, or inbox me at the Desperate English Housewife in Washington Facebook page! I’ll announce the winner Friday 5pm USA time!

Question: Who is Zara Phillips married to?

Lovely Zara (who lives in Cheltenham, don’t ya know!)

And that’s my Christmas gift to you, dear blog readers!

About Hiho Silver UK

There’s a great story behind Hiho Silver, which bubbled forth as an idea some 20 years ago, on a Thai ferry round the islands. One of the founders, Andrew and his sister, had just spent the last two months travelling in India and Thailand and were heading to the islands to relax and to do some diving. They were sat on a sack of potatoes next to a really chatty American man named Willy and over the next few days (and several bottles of Mekong whisky, very hot tom yum soup and some beautiful dives) they made a real friend for life.

Willy had started a business selling Mexican jewellery in the US and offered them the chance to bring the idea over to the UK. They literally jumped at the chance of going on an exploratory trip to the US and Mexico and whilst over there, planned the first show which went well and paid for stock for the next show, and so, with a wallpaper table, a purple velvet cloth and a rucksack of silver, the Hiho Silver story started…

Within four years, Hiho Silver was doing two hundred retail shows a year at venues like Henley Regatta, Cartier Polo, Glorious Goodwood and Badminton Horse Trials and then fourteen years later had a number of shops in small market towns with a fabulous team of people running them. You can’t get more of a British success story at British events than that!

Posted in Travel | Tagged American, Americans, Badminton Horse Trials, Blog, Britain, British, British countryside, Britishness, Christmas, Culture, Duchess Kate, England, expat, Henley Regatta, Hiho Silver, Hiho UK, hocoblogs@@@, Polo, silver jewellery, Somerset, UK, USA, Zara Phillips | 1 Comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 541

Posted on December 16, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

The forking issue

Okay, here’s the deal: we Brits often comment on the way Americans eat. Yes, we do. #sorry

When I say ‘Americans’ I don’t mean all Americans, but some Americans. So don’t take offence if you’re not one of the Americans about whom I am referring, and if you are one of the Americans about whom I am referring, I am just writing a blog ‘taking the piss’ British style 🙂 .

So, the American fork-eating thing is a thing we Brits often comment about. Yes, really, it’s true.

Why? What is so different about the way Americans and Brits eat?

Watch this.

And this.

http://youtu.be/YASwIRYMZPg

And this.

It’s really all about the way we hold the fork. There are two basic methods for eating with a knife and fork. The “American” way involves having your fork in your left (often held in the fist, not with the index finger on top of the fork) and your knife in your right when cutting your food, then putting the knife down and switching your fork to your right hand to eat, tines facing upwards. (If you’re right-handed, that is.) With the “European” method, the fork remains in the left hand and the knife helps coax your food onto your fork. The tines remain facing downwards.

According to some etiquette books, the American style came to the States with the British colonists and took hold here, while the European method is a somewhat more recent change. Well I never! You mean my father’s descendants once held their forks like that? He’ll deny it! 😉

The European style is also referred to as “hidden handle” because the knife and fork are held in such a way that the handles are tucked into the palm and held by the thumb and forefinger.

The European way

The American style is also referred to as the “zig-zag method” where the fork is held like a spoon and indeed sometimes used like a spoon to scoop rather than spear food.

According to Wikipedia, American spies were exposed in at least two American films by using the wrong fork technique: O.S.S. (1946) and The Big Red One (1980). Genius!

We Brits talk about this fork thing a lot. And when I was in DC this very weekend I was given a fork that was impossible to hold using the European method I am used to (index finger on the top). So I had to hold the fork in my fist American-style and switch hands to eat. (NB: It was a very trendy hotel with uber-trendy cutlery (aka silverware) and I think it was more style over practicality!).

This is that fork.

The trendy fork

Me trying to eat American-style

The Robin Christmas card

‘Do you get Robins in the USA?’ asked a British friend who sent me this Christmas card, below.
‘Not like these little chaps,’ replied I. ‘They’re gurt big thrushes here in America-land.’

Little Robin Redbreast 🙂

I don’t think I’ve seen a Christmas card (or ‘holiday’ card) with a robin on in the USA. What a quintessentially British thing it is!

Can you turn it down, please?

God knows I’ve tried to like them, but I just can’t do it. American sports bars, that is.

Argh, the noise!
Argh, the football!
Argh, the people on TV talking about football!

On Sunday I missed the good old British pub with the log fire and the oak tables and the roast dinners and the sing-song banter of old men reminiscing about times gone by (am I slightly romanticising this?!). Anyway, we took my British friend into an authentic American sports bar in Columbia with its 109 sports screens for the Ravens game. You know, just to experience it.

This. Ugh.

Good lord, never again! Especially at lunch time when an American football game is about to start. I couldn’t hear myself think, nor my friend and my husband speak, over the noise of the TV commentators.

‘Would it be possible to turn the TV down?’ I asked in my best British accent.
‘Um, it’s Sunday football in a sports bar,’ replied the waitress.

Fair enough. But that whole American sports bar thing is definitely not my cup of tea!

Posted in Travel | Tagged accents, America, American, American sports bars, American style eating, American TV, Blog, Britain, British, British piss taking, Christmas, Christmas cards, Columbia, Culture, cup of tea, DC, eating, eating differences, eating with a fork, England, English, European style eating, expat, expats, food, hocoblogs@@@, knives and forks, lifestyle, Ravens, Robin Redbreast, silverware, Thoughts, USA | 1 Comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 540

Posted on December 15, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

The English Dialect Coach

I love talking in my British/English accent in America – it’s been a useful tool. So useful that I am due to be the dialect coach for Chesapeake Shakespeare Company’s upcoming production of The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde in the new year. #chuffedtobits

It will be interesting to work with American actors to perfect that high class British accent. I’ll have them all talking like Judy Dench and Rupert Everett in no time.

Everyone practice now – ‘Handbag’!

The British Embassy

We went to the British Embassy in Washington DC this weekend for the kids’ Christmas party. As we drove past the Embassies from the other countries along the route, my UK friend was in awe at the grandeur of the buildings. Then we came to the British Embassy, which, quite frankly looks just like a 1970s civil service building in Slough.

Civil service 1970s architecture at its best 😉

The Ambassador’s Residence is all together different, thankfully. It’s all very posh and smart, but when I am there I do think I have stepped back into the 1950s. Not a place to wear leopard print boots, I gather. Sadly, I don’t own a twin set and pearls to fit in there 😉 .

Posted in Travel | Tagged accents, Ambassador's residence, America, American, Britain, British, British accent, British Ambassador, British Embassy, Chesapeake Shakespeare Company, civil service, Culture, England, English, English accent, expat, hocoblogs@@@, Judy Dench, Oscar Wilde, Rupert Everett, Slough, The Importance of Being Earnest, UK, USA, Washington DC | Leave a comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 539

Posted on December 15, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Hectic life in the USA!

It’s been utterly hectic in America-land this week just gone. My UK friend will need a holiday to get over the busy week she’s had.

So, what have we been up to?

Let’s talk about the trip to NYC for the Dr Oz show.

The bus
I nearly missed my bus to NYC, mostly because I can’t follow the Sat Nav when they put new effing roads in on the I95 in Baltimore! I had to run (in my heels) to attempt to catch my bus, which was just pulling away, and I now know that nothing gets more attention than yelling ‘That’s my bloody bus to New York!’ in a British accent around a group of Americans. Bless them for all cheering when I got on. And off I headed to New York City.

Happy to be in NYC!

The trip
I got three glimpses of New York this time round, only because I was making my way to the ABC studios via cab to be a guest on the Dr Oz show. Why would you do this? some people asked. Why not? I replied. For the record, the NYC I saw out of the cab window was both sunny and cloudy, wintry and Christmassy and as mad and delightful as ever.

Just got a glimpse of the city!

The show
I confess I have never actually seen the Dr Oz show, I’m just kind of aware of his name in a slightly controversial way. Anyhow, that did not put me off. What’s not to like about being a guest on one of the USA’s most successful daytime shows?!

The Dr. Oz Show is a TV talk show, hosted by Mehmet Oz, a cardiothoracic surgeon and teaching professor at Columbia University who became famous for his appearances on The Oprah Winfrey Show. He was very pleasant, to be fair.

In my dressing room backstage

My Dr Oz dressing room 🙂

Slightly enjoying the moment!

He focuses a lot on diet and weight loss, and, in this case, for me, insomnia. I’d spent all week making home videos about my insomnia and sent them off to the producers.

This is how it worked on the day: the TV audience were getting entertained by some ‘comedian’; I get pulled on stage by the crew who show me where to stand etc, then I have 25 seconds before the cameras roll and they show my home videos, and then Dr Oz and a sleep expert (who was very sweet) come and talk to me about how I have or haven’t been sleeping (I tell them and the audience murmurs slightly at my British accent), then Dr Oz and sweet sleep expert tell me what I should do about it (take a 10 step plan to better my sleep) and then everyone claps and cheers and they wish me well.

The show will be aired in January, so watch this blog for more info!

The jacket
However, dear readers, let it be known that Dr Oz’s wardrobe team does not like shoulders on TV. I had been instructed to wear colour, which is hard for me, since I wear mostly black. Yet I pulled out a summer dress, which they liked until I actually wore it, and then they commented that there was too much leg (of course) and too much shoulder (WTF?!). Too much shoulder? I was advised that this is a daytime show. They decided to cover my shoulders. Shoulders are obviously very offensive to middle-American housewives. So they rolled out this dreadful polyester jacket in black (IN BLACK!! I would have worn black anyway if I had been allowed!) that was two sizes too big, and there I stood on set dressed like a middle-aged American school mom with a penchant for JC Penney’s sale bargains. Sigh. I did not feel like me at all!

I did attempt to walk out on to set without the jacket by taking it off and pretending to be hot, but they caught me just before I walked through the curtains. Damn! I salvaged an ounce of street cred by rolling up the sleeves slightly. But that jacket will give me nightmares for a while yet!

Thumbs down for the middle-aged mom jacket 😉

And that was my Dr Oz experience. They were a professional production team, and the dressing room snacks were awesome, so, despite the jacket incident, it was all pretty darn cool for a day in NYC.

The pint
After the show I went for a pint in The Spotted Pig in NYC. They had proper British pint glasses! Way to go, NYC!

A much-needed pint after the show (not recommended by Dr Oz) 😉

Posted in Travel | Tagged ABC studios, America, American, Baltimore, behind the scenes, Britain, British, Culture, Dr Oz, Dr Oz show, England, English, expat, expats, hocoblogs@@@, insomnia, New York city, NYC, Oprah Winfrey, pint of beer, Spotted Pig, Thoughts, UK, USA | 5 Comments

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 538

Posted on December 11, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

The Dr Oz Show

Who is Dr Oz and why am I writing about him? Is he an Australian Doctor in the Outback, as I first thought? No, he is not.

He is a TV doctor on the ABC network in New York, and he has a big following with stay-at-home-moms and other such folk who might like to watch TV in the daytime (not judging! 😉 ) I think he’s a bit like that doctor that Richard and Judy used to have on This Morning in the UK – Chris Whatshisface – except Chris Whathisface is a bit less controversial.

Oh yes, Do Oz is quite a controversial figure in the fitness, weight loss and nutrition industry, but let’s push that to one side for the purpose of this blog and let’s talk about ME BEING ON HIS SHOW! WTF?!!

Dr Oz, who is not Australian 🙂

When I tell people I am going on his show they’ve cried: ‘How did you make that happen?!’ Well, I’m not giving away my secrets!

So, tomorrow I’m heading to New York City – the place I love and the place that is alive! – to sit in a TV studio and talk to Dr Oz about my insomnia! I’m so tired all the time that even as I write this I’m nodding off (as I suspect you are whilst reading it 😉 ). So, that is my day tomorrow. And why not, hey? It’s all about the experience, folks (and getting my British face/arse on American TV!).

British visitor

My friend’s time in the USA is nearly up.

I think it’s been interesting for her to see a different way of life out here. My life is hectic anyway, but it’s been a pleasure to share it with a fellow Brit for the week.

Fun times in Columbia, MD

She thinks I’ll struggle slightly with life when I go back to the UK. I think I will too. We’ll see what happens, folks.

Posted in Travel | Tagged America, American, British, Culture, Dr Oz show, England, English, expat, insomnia, lifestyle, lifstyle, New York, NYC, Richard and Judy, This Morning, UK | 4 Comments

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 537

Posted on December 10, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

UK impressions

My UK visitor and I have now completed two shopping malls (her choice!!!) and Downtown Baltimore. She fell in love with the Federal Hill area of Baltimore, with its market, character, funky town houses, culture, the fact you can walk, and that it isn’t suburbia.

Federal Hill

I always say that as much as I totally APPRECIATE living in the ‘burbs, with its safety, family areas, pools and schools, but there is something so enriching about seeing the way of living in the city. For a start, I wouldn’t shop in Giant (learning to despise that store), I’d shop on a daily basis in the market with its fresh fish, veges and meat. And maybe I’d stop for a taco and beer whilst I did that. Gotta love the Federal Hill market!

Cheese, Gromit!

The joy of public transport in Columbia

My friend recently started a job in Washington DC. The car commute from Columbia is what’s officially known as ‘a bit of a bugger’ by us Brits. But, my friend has found a bus that he can take now from just round the corner from his Columbia home This, UK friends, is a rare thing! Public transport out of and into Columbia, MD! Wowsers!

I’m glad he’s doing the public transport thing. More people should. It’s so liberating!

A rare sight in Columbia, MD

If there was one thing I would wish for Columbia, its public transport around the area and to the cities. I feel for friends who spend hours driving their kids around to activities and to the Mall. Get the little sods on the bus, for Gawd’s sake! It shows them independence, gives you more time, and it’s GREEN! Come on, Columbia, let’s make it happen (gets GREEN TRANSPORT in COLUMBIA banner made up…. 😉 ).

Posted in Travel | Tagged America, American, Americans, Baltimore, beer, Blog, Britain, British, bus, Columbia, Culture, England, English, expat, expats, Federal Hill, Giant store, hocoblogs@@@, lifestyle, maryland, public transport, Shopping mall, suburbs, taco, Travel, UK, USA, Washington | 2 Comments

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 536

Posted on December 8, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Desperate Housewife birthday cake!

Just take a look at this bit of fabulous, by my fabulous American friends 🙂

Amazing!

That’s what it looked like when I saw it on Saturday night.

This is what it looked like on Sunday morning…..

🙂

This image is very telling….a good night was had!

😉

Posted in Travel | Tagged American, birthday, Blog, Britain, British, Culture, Desperate English Housewife in USA, expat, expats, hocoblogs@@@, USA | 1 Comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 535

Posted on December 8, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Party bus Americana

On Saturday we took a party bus around Baltimore. I hear party buses are quite the thing in London now – it’s how to get all your chums round the town in one piece.

This party bus was, as it should be in America, an old yellow school bus painted black, seats stripped out of rows and into side benches, with coolers, dance poles and a loud sound system. Rocking!

Awesome. I can now say I’ve travelled in an American school bus, all be it a crazy party one!

Heading on the old school bus!

Hugging in America

I’ve grown accustomed to the Americana way of hugs with a greeting. I like it. We Brits often just offer a hand to shake, but here there’s less formality and more welcoming of open arms. Sure, it may differ from NYC to Atlanta, but here in Maryland there is a hugging thing going on, and I shall bring that back to the UK. It makes you feel very welcomed. Our awkward British reserve can feel slightly uncomfortable about this, but I say let’s HUG, British folk!

Yeah, let’s hug!

Posted in Travel | Tagged America, American, Americans, Baltimore, Blog, Britain, British, British reserve, Culture, English, expat, expats, hocoblogs@@@, hugging, lifestyle, school bus, UK, USA | Leave a comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 534

Posted on December 5, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Visitor from the UK

So my visitor has only been here 24 hours now from the UK, but she’s noticing the differences already.

She’s been to the States before, but she’s never lived here, and as you and I know, it’s v v v v v different to live here than it is to holiday here.

Me and Kate, from the land of Englishers 🙂

So, what has she to say about it all so far?

1. As we approach my neighborhood in Columbia, MD. ‘Ooooh, it’s just like Desperate Housewives!’ True that.

2. When she’s looking for the milk in one side of the fridge and I tell her the fridge opens on the other side too: ‘Oooh, it’s massive – I thought that was your freezer! I love big fridges.’ True that.

3. When we’re driving. ‘The roads are so big and spacious and it feels so open. In the UK it takes ages to drive anywhere, or park.’ True that.

🙂

Not on the Telly again?!!!

Yep, sure am on Fox 45! Note how many times I say ‘fabulous’ and ‘quality’ – and I manage to get a top British ‘brilliant’ in there! Yeah!!!

🙂

Posted in Travel | Tagged accents, America, American, Blog, brilliant, Britain, British, Claire McGill, Culture, driving, England, English, expat, Fox 45, fridges, hocoblogs@@@, roads, Travel, TV, UK, USA, visiting | 1 Comment

Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 533

Posted on December 3, 2014 by ukdesperatehousewifeusa

Forty in the USA!

Today I turned 40 in the USA. Did you read what I just wrote? I wrote ‘turned 40’, which is not a phrase I would have used before living in the States. I would have said something like ‘I was 40 today’ in UK-speaky!

Anyway, yes, the Desperate Housewife is 40, which, I am told, properly qualifies me as a MILF…. 😉

Happy Birthday Brunch to Me!

Back on TV!

This recurring thing of me being on TV in America-land is happening again – and it’s this Friday 5 December, WBFF Fox 45, 945am.

This time I’m promoting Fitness Holiday Gifts – right up my street!

What can you get for the fitness freak in your life?

The Polar Loop; Arctic Ease Wraps; My Locker customised apparel. I’m loving them all, especially the Polar Loop – it even tells me when to get up off my arse and my move (like it will do in about 10 mins!).

This is me in my promo gear and customised hat!

Be sure to tune in or check back to the blog for the video! 🙂

Visitor from the UK

I have a visitor coming over from the UK to spend 10 days with me. She doesn’t know it yet, but I’m going to be recording her impressions of everything we do and see as I take her around Maryland. It’s going to be interesting!