Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 306

The American Tooth Fairy

So, the American Tooth Fairy had to make an appearance for the first time last night. But it did not happen.

Why? Because we stumbled at the American gold coin bit. And believe me, we were under strict instructions that the tooth fairy would be leaving a very big, shiny gold coin (and nothing else would do – not even a $2 bill that is so sought after – which I found out AFTER I spent mine).

But wait….there are no bloody great big gold coins in American money!

What to do?!

Nothing big and gold here, surprisingly.

Nothing big and gold here, surprisingly.

Now, my other half has TWO man drawers. One is full of American shite that he is hoarding and may well need one fine day (and I shove stuff in there) and the other is full of British shite that he is hoarding and may well need one rainy day (and I shove stuff in there too) ๐Ÿ™‚

(If you don’t know about the man drawer, watch most excellent British comedian Michael McIntyre discussing the man drawer – oh yes, he talks about foreign currency in the man drawer…)

Anyway, we rooted around in the UK man drawer hopeful of finding a British ยฃ2 coin…..and phew, there is was, staring up at us in all its gold (and some silver) glory! Hoorah, the tooth fairy wins out after all, and we don’t get a great big mouthful at what a rubbish tooth fairy it is in the States from a gappy five-year old.

The Queen / Tooth Fairy

The Queen / Tooth Fairy

As he clasped the gold coin in his hand this morning, he started at the picture of the Queen.

‘Is that the tooth fairy with a funny old hat and great big head?’ he asked.

I realised he didn’t recognise the Queen.

‘No, darling, that’s the Queen of England.’
‘So, did she fly over and put the coin under my pillow?’

Oooh, stuck here.

‘Um, no, the tooth fairy brought a coin all the way of England for you, because your teeth were made in England.’

(And began to decay in America, thank you high fructose corn syrup, but that’s another story!)

‘So she flew over in the night? She must have flown very fast.’
‘Er, yes, she sailed on the wind…’

And such like.

And that is how to do a British/American tooth fairy event. Mission complete ๐Ÿ™‚

Internations blog

I was asked this week if I would feature my blog on Internations, a site for expats that ‘connects global minds.’

I jolly well would!

My blog is now part of the online USA expat community for expatriates over here, particularly in the D.C area.

And I got a nice little badge for my efforts! Huzzah!

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9 Responses to Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 306

  1. mkearns says:

    He probably means a $1 coin – no-one uses them, perhaps that’s why you haven’t run into any.$1_Coin_Program

  2. Janey says:

    You can’t blame high fructose corn syrup for tooth decay. My children, now both in their 20s were raised in various parts of the US and have never had a cavity. Twice-yearly visits to the dentist for a cleaning since age 3 and proper brushing & flossing teeth twice-daily helps prevent most dental decay issues no matter what your diet.

  3. EmmaK says:

    have no fear. You can get the coin the Sacagawea dollar at the bank. That’s the coin most Tooth Fairies prefer.

  4. Dan says:

    Funny, I just watched Micheal McIntyre’s message for couple without kids. Hilarious!!

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