Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 124

Mother’s Day

Yep, it’s USA Mother’s Day this Sunday, which means that it’s pretty much like any other day, except that there might be a valiant attempt at making breakfast for me, which will result in me having to clear up much more mess than usual, which will be lovely.

Pampering day? Luncheon out? No thanks! I actually made a choice to go and see a bunch of cowboys at a Wild West Show and fairground, so watch this space….

Yeeeeehah!

Yeeeeehah!

Cricket pitch

Howard County Recreation and Parks Department have decided to do something extremely British.

They have a cricket ground. Oooh, it’s all cucumber sandwiches and cups of tea whilst lazing on a deck chair on a summer’s day in a British village setting…….

Howard County Cricket Ground - lovely jubbly!

Howard County Cricket Ground – lovely jubbly!

Now, even though I am British, I know sweet FA about cricket. The most interested I got was in the late 80s when I was going out with a sixth former at school, and so I had to spend most of my Sunday afternoons sitting by the cricket pitch watching all the sixth form boys in their whites, rubbing their balls (never understood that bit) and admiring their batting technique. I have no idea about the rules, except that cricket matches take bloody ages and sometimes you get to drink Pimms.

Anyhow, I can’t attend the opening, sadly, because I am dying to meet Howard County Executive Ken Ulman and Recreation and Parks Director John R. Byrd, who both seem jolly nice chaps.

I wonder how many Americans are familiar with cricket – it must have caught on in the area for there to be a cricket pitch laid down in the first place…..

I have offered to make cucumber sandwiches should they need them πŸ™‚

Oooh, delicious!

Oooh, delicious!

Gangs of Howard County

I nearly spat into my green tea ce matin when I read in Columbia Patch about the Gangs of Howard County (it doesn’t really have the same ring to it as the Gangs of New York, does it?)

They are called the ‘Bloods’ gang and they don’t sound very nice boys and girls at all.

Eighteen members of the Bloods allegedly kept shared firearms, sold drugs and used the money from drug sales, burglaries, robberies and home invasions to finance gang activities.

That’s not what we want to hear. Anyway, they’ve been banged up which is a relief.

Phew!

Phew!

37 things you will only find funny if you’re British

My friend Emma posted this on FB today – it needs sharing with you because it made me titter into my spinach salad.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/things-youll-find-funny-if-youre-british

Tell me, USA chums, did you find these amusing too….?

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14 Responses to Desperate English Housewife in Washington, chapter 124

  1. Carol says:

    Shame you can’t get to the opening and are missing the opportunity to meet your hero! Apparently there is an indoor cricket centre somewhere in Jessup run by a private company. And Tom had to remember how to play cricket in 5th grade at Pointers Run Elementary as they have a cricket set there. So there does seem to be a fondness for the game in HoCo. I am guessing that HoCo Bloods don’t play cricket…

  2. jacqueline moore says:

    Someday you won’t be stuck clearing up more mess than usual; you’re son will be old enough to take you out to eat on Mother’s Day/Mothering Sunday, and he will be confused that it makes you burst into tears because the days of lumpy pancakes from a tornado-hit kitchen went by too, too, fast.

  3. jacqueline moore says:

    BTW- did find those amusing, especially the Mother Lyon one; it’s so wrong it’s fabulous! But “only Brits find funny”? Look up “Headlines”- jay leno did the same sort of thing every Monday night for 20 years-because Americans love that stuff… the restaurant signs are always great, love the website “Chinglish”!

  4. Pat and Pam says:

    Mother’s Day (and other special days) and eating out: my mother had a very good rule, DO NOT eat out on those days. Even your favourite restaurant will be crowded, service will be slow, and the food will be rushed and nothing is as good as usual. Avoid!

    Loved all the supposed Brit humor signs and articles. Doubt that only Brits would like them, but I really can’t judge, as I am American but have been living with a Brit for over 35 years and actually living in England for nearly 17. Makes me very much mid-Atlantic, I guess.

    (Hmmm, I just realized that I have used a mixture of American and British spellings above. I guess that’s me!)

  5. meowclaire says:

    Loved the 37 funny things- made me laugh aloud. Classics. Thanks for sharing πŸ™‚ I hope you have a very happy USA Mothers Day. Miss you.x

  6. Elyse says:

    Maryland native… found those things funny.

    As for cricket – I used to see cricket games going on all the time at the University of Maryland, College Park. I think we have enough immigrants familiar with the game that it’s made at least a little impact over here.

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